I leaned something about myself today.
I'm not, nor will I ever be, a mechanic.
I can work out what's wrong, but when it comes to fixing it, I should bring in an expert. My sister constantly reminds me of what I was like as a child. I was never happier than with a screwdriver in my hand. Taking something apart. Did I ever succeed in putting it back together again. No, I didn't. I still remember getting a good clip around the head one Christmas. I had been given a watch, a quite nice watch. Before the Queens speech on Christmas Day I was sat on my bed, skriking and surrounded by bits of the said watch. I had taken it apart. Could I put it back together, could I fuck. You would have thought I would have learned during my formative years that reassembly of mechanical 'things' is not a strong point. I should also have learned that disassembly of things should be avoided. Not at all. I'm still at it to this day.
During yesterday evening there was a smell that I didn't recognise. A bit like the smell of electricity !!) I thought nothing of it at the time. This morning I noticed that the light which indicates that 230 volts are coming into the van was no longer lit and, none of the lights were working.
I went outside, checked the connection, came back in. Still no light. I went out again, changed the socket that I was plugged into, came back in again. Again no light on the console. I went out for a third time and removed the polarity reversing cable, the one that stops you getting electrocuted. Still nothing.
Oh bugger, not only am I out of gas, I'm also now without electricity. I checked the fridge and all the sockets in the van, they were working fine. Out comes the manual for a read up.
Here goes.....
When not plugged in the lights, electricity needed for operation of the diesel heating system and the fridge are powered by a big leisure battery. None of the plugs will work as they are connected to the mains ring. The fridge obviously uses quite a lot of power so you also have the option to switch is to gas.
When plugged in all the appliances and the fridge can operate on the mains. By powers of deduction I worked out that, plugged in or not, lights will always work off the leisure battery, as would the electrics needed to heat the plugs that make the central heating system work.
If that is the case then, there must be something amiss with the circuit that charges the leisure battery. A month ago, whilst 'wild camping' on the island of Mull on the East coast of Scotland! my friends Bill and Katrina had hired a camper van. 'Wild camping' consists of, as the name suggests, camping in the wild. In the wild there tends to be an absence of electrical sockets so you are very much dependent on gas and the charge in the leisure battery. The camper van that Bill had rented appeared not to be holdings charge very well. I suspect it was more to do with having the fridge on the battery and all the lights on, nevertheless, by running the engine for 20 minutes he was able to recharge the leisure battery to near full. This is because both the leisure battery and the normal battery can also be charged from the alternator.
So, with that knowledge in my little heed, I put the van into neutral and turned on the engine. Lo and behold, we had light. I left it running for a little while and saw from the console in the cab that the leisure battery was indeed charging.
I now knew that, although the problem with the direct connection to the mains not charging the leisure battery, it was no big deal.
Pulling my vehicle papers from the locker I set about emailing the Fullers leisure salesman in Nottingham. The vehicle had come with a 6 month guarantee. As I'd only bought it in August, that guarantee still and had few months to run. My hope would be that, if I emailed the service department, explained the diagnosis, they may have come across it before and better still, there may be a quick and simple fix. This I did.
Anyone normal, with the knowledge that, while diagnosis of problems is a skill, the practical 'fixing' of the problem if it has anything to do with wires or 'bits' is most certainly not a skill, would have left it that and waited for the service department to get back in touch.
Not me, oh no. As I write I reflect on my attempts to change the light sockets in the house from standard white ones to brushed stainless steel. Quite a simple task one would have thought (providing one switched off the mains first). Not in my case, for almost six years my attempts resulted in it being anyones fucking guess which light came on when I pressed a switch. Being an open plan apartment this was a problem. Almost every night I was up and down the spiral staircase pressing switches to find the right combination for all the lights to go off.
I did eventually call in an electrician. It took him almost all afternoon to put it right. Of course I abdicated all responsibility, blaming an electrician I had employed !!!
Anyway, whilst waiting for a response I had a little read and undid a few screws, poked in a fuse box. Nothing seemed apparently wrong, I would have no clue what I was looking for. Invariably, when i have a screwdriver in my hand, I end up left with either a screw too many or a screw missing.
As I was just in the process of putting the cover back on the fuse box, my phone rang. The number that came up was Nottingham. I can't fault the service of Fullers Motorhomes. The guy on the end of the phone was Nathan. I explained the symptoms.
" sounds like the charging unit" he said.
I had sort of worked that out myself but I let him carry on.
" Have you checked the fuse" he asked.
"Is it I the fuse box, I responded'
"No, it's on the charging unit"
Where is the charging unit"
"It's usually under the drivers seat." He advised.
Torch in one hand. Phone in the other I pulled open the cover under the drivers seat to reveal a black box.
Nathan told me that there should be a green fuse, I needed to remove it and check it hadn't blown. After a bit of poking around I found something that looked green, removed a small clip and took hold of the green thing. As I pulled it out, I dropped it, it disappeared under the box with a rattle that suggested it may have landed somewhere that was not that accessible.
"Fuck" I cursed, I've dropped it.
" it probably isn't the fuse" Nathan said trying to reassure me, " these charging units are prone to going faulty", " we changed out two only last week"
After a couple of minutes it became apparent that the only way I would stand any chance of accessing the said green fuse would be to take the side cover off the drivers seat.
I told Nathan I would call him back and set about unscrewing the cover.
To cut a long story short, I couldn't recover the fuse!!
By now I had covers and screws all over the floor. I called Nathan back. Told him the fuse was lost forever and asked what he suggested. He again suggested that it probably wasn't the fuse but, if I wanted to be sure, get hold of a 30 amp blade fuse ( I have actually got everything but a 30 amp fuse in my fuse and bulb replacement kit which is a mandatory requirement when travelling on the continent.)
Nathan did confirm that as the vehicle was still under warranty he would raise a job and I should pop in when I returned. In the meantime, just run the engine for 20 minutes when the charge drops to top up the leisure battery.
I should have just reported the fault in the first place and left it to the experts . Will I have learnt from this. Probably not.
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